Why did God make death? All those painful things that happen to us, why were they made? Can’t the world work without unhappy and sad things?

This is similar to asking that can’t there be light all the time? Why darkness? But if there had never been any kind of darkness, how would we have been able to tell that it is light?

self cantrol

If there had been no sadness, how would happiness barge in? That sounds pretty good. Doesn’t it?

Bad things happen to us so that we can understand when the good happening to us is and relish it. But why can’t we enjoy bad things as we enjoy good ones? Why we hate the bad things so much?

I haven’t met anyone who has mastered the art of self control but I think the person who achieves complete self control would be unbiased towards both happiness and sadness, good and bad. But does such a person exist in this world?

Now is the time when talking about self control is a taboo. Things like self control exist only in books. The leadership gurus like Robin Sharma keep emphasizing on self control but how many of us take it seriously? How many of us actually try to attain self control? How many of us try to react calmly in both happy and sad situations?

Self control to stay happy

Do we really need self control?  Yes, because it is the only way to stay happy. The life of humans is nothing but a battle. A battle it is, where each one of us needs to fight with our own self. We need to fight with our own self to stay happy.

Most of the times, the sadness we experience is self inflicted. We fight with someone and then spend hours thinking about that fight. We try to imagine the same situation again and again and find out what went wrong, what we could’ve said or what we shouldn’t have said. Time spent like this is nothing but a waste of precious moments given to us for living, for doing what we want to do.

But just because we lack in self control, just because we cannot stop our mind from thinking about those angry or sad moments, we accept being unhappy. If someone asked you to keep a journal to note down the time for which you have been unhappy because you weren’t thinking good things, you would know how much time do you lose each year in that way. And that time could’ve been used to fulfil your dreams or just to pamper your own self or your loved ones.

Self control to achieve more goals

Self control plays a great role in getting you what you want. After all, it is not always about being happy and content. The human mechanism works like that. Once we get something, we start craving for more. Once we start earning 6 figure salaries, we long to see one more figure attached to it and this goes on till forever.

Each one of us has goals and the most important thing we need to reach our goals is focus. We need to be focused on what we want if we really want it. But how can you stay focused when you cannot control what you think? How can you stay focused when you cannot control what you do? How can you stay focused when you don’t have an authority over your own mind and body?

If only, you practice self control, you become a master of your life. I might sound like Robin Sharma, but isn’t that what we want to be? We want to be really good at whatever we like to do. Don’t we?

I came across with the concept of self control when I read about the character of Lord Rama in The Ramayana: The Rise of Sun Prince by Shubha Vilas. His life was governed with the principle of self control. And that’s why He managed to do great things without getting carried away ever in His entire life.

And we can do great things too, only if we follow self control. What do you think?

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  1. Hi Manpreet,

    You have brought the topic very well on the table. Yes it is very hard to control our self and infact we can’t but still we have to try.

    What I do is – I use to remind my mind about what I want to do. Like If I dont want to fight with someone when I know that he/she has done something that can lead us to fight, I write a line on my palm that “tujhe nhi ladna” and I keep repeating that and in this way I use to avoid conflicts many a time.

    There are other methods also like I use to set reminder on my phone and those remind me the goal that I want to follow or the things on which I want to focus more.

    Thanks for the great post. Keep writing 🙂


  2. Hi Manpreet,

    Self control is one of the most important fact to get success in life easily and quickly.
    You mention here some great points that helps to get motivated and control yourself easily.

    Thanks for the nice sharing.

  3. Hi Manpreet,
    your topic very intresting for all of us. this is very natural thing that some time we all loss controls themself and this problem can create many problems so this factor is very important for our life

    • Hello Rohit, yes. Some of us do lose control sometimes and I am the person who does that the most. Anger management is something really required by each one of these days. Well, this gives me another idea. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment and allowing me to get another post idea from this 🙂


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